Chapter 7: Untitled

Josh rose with a start, reaching toward the other side of the bed for the warmth of her body. The room was quiet. It was dimly lit in the room, the morning still lost somewhere behind the closed drapes. Finding his bed empty, he rose quickly, calling out her name.

“Mya?” Getting no answer, he walked to the door of his bedroom searching the living room for any sign of her. Nothing. Leaning against the door frame, he sighed heavily.

Stepping back into his room, he yawned, widely stretching his arms high above his head. The room had taken on a mild chill. Josh shuddered wrapping his arms around his torso. Making his way back to his bed, he wiped the sleep from his eyes, and fished for a pair of boxers in the nightstand.

“Mya what am I going to do with you?” He spoke into the air.

Josh fought the urge to go down to the front desk and ask if she had checked out even though he wanted to know why she had left without so much as a good-bye.

He brought the pillow to his face and inhaled deeply, the scent of her perfume gracing his body. Then it hit him. He just had sex with a virgin. He had never in his life had sex with a virgin! Even when he had lost his own virginity it was to a very experienced woman.

Thinking back he’d wished Mya would have disclosed that bit of information with him beforehand. Maybe he wouldn’t have…no there was no way he wouldn’t have slept with her, that was bound to happen. But he would have been more gentle and persistent about getting her involved, asking her what she did and did not like.

“Forget it.” It was no use anyway. She was gone and so was her virginity. She had left him all alone to reprimand himself for being such a horny toad. He practically seduced her right out of her clothes. But she had never once said the word “no”. Not even when he licked the sauce from her fingers, kissed her up against the wall, or led her to the bedroom and coaxed her down to her bra and panties.

Josh had laid the charm on heavy, heavier than he ever had before, making his behavior almost overbearing. He’d been desperate to move her past the sad experiences they both knew to well toward something more personal; sex. He sighed again.

He had never met a woman who was so intensely sensual without even knowing it. It was no effort on her part. It was how she walked and talked, how she listened intently to his despondent ramblings, how she smiled and laughed.

“This is crazy.” Josh thought. She made him feel like a teenager all over again.

At twenty-four, he had never imagined any woman having the effect on him that Mya did. His own hormones and arrogance had put him at a lost of control more than the alcohol itself. He was never one to look for a relationship, only needing momentary pleasure when the moment arose.

However, Mya was an exception to that rule and even though he didn’t want to admit, it had been she who had seduced him. It was she who was in total control from the beginning, stringing him along like a puppeteer. Yes he had been the one undressing and coaxing, but it was she who was driving him to do so. Poison she is!

~*~*~*~

After splashing her face with cool water, Mya turned on the shower and stepped beneath the warm spray.

Shaking her head, she cursed again. The water felt good, but did nothing to wash away the feeling of dread that flooded her or the soreness between her legs, that constantly reminded her of what she had done. “What was I thinking?” She shouted at the faucet, the spray of water rinsing her words down the drain. She swore, loudly, the profanity echoing around the tiled walls.

Last night rushed back to her in glaring detail and she groaned at her stupidity. “God what was I thinking?” She asked again, hoping to reassure herself that she didn’t sleep with a man she didn’t know. “In a minute I will wake up from this dream.”

But that minute never came. That minute stretched into ten minutes, and then fifteen until Mya was forced to face the facts; the scent, the soreness…the knocking on the door.

“Mya?”

Mya groaned at the sound of his voice, “Go away.” She mumbled, sliding down until the cold ceramic surface was against her back. The water fell down on her rapidly.

“We need to talk. I’m sorry…” He paused, believing that an apology was not the best way to start off the conversation. What would an apology mean when he wasn’t really sorry?

She heard the door open and the beat of footsteps as he entered the bathroom.

“I’m gonna leave a towel and some clothes here for you, while I go to the other bathroom to wash up. Okay?” He didn’t receive an answer but he was sure she had heard him.

When Josh left the room, Mya had finally allowed the tears to fall. It was official her life would never be the same again and that’s all she wanted more than anything; a normal life.

Josh walked into the half-bathroom to wash up at the sink. He took his time washing all signs of regret from his face. When he talked with Mya he didn’t want her to…he didn’t want her to what? Leave and walk out his apartment or blame herself? Yes, that was it, he would rather her blame him than herself.

For the first time, he wanted to continue something after sex; it was no use for them to be alone anymore. He didn’t want to jump into a relationship, but since neither one of them had anyone of importance in their life it was worth a try to see if anything was left between them.

A sound off in the distance caused Josh to pick his pace. He knew it was Mya coming out of the bathroom and he didn’t want to give her the chance to leave before they talked. He quickly dressed in a wife-beater and sweatpants after making sure all traces of remorse were nonexistent.

“Mya?” He called out to her and again no answer. Well not an answer from her anyway, but from his puppy, Whiskey instead, who answered him with a bark.

“I really fucked up Whiskey. Big time.” The puppy trudged over to him and laid his head against his owner’s lap.

The dog whimpered.

“What are you sad for? I’m the reason she’s leaving us. Wait why am I talking to a dog?” Josh chuckled when Whiskey brushed his wet nose against his palm.

“You’re only near me cause you can’t get to her.” He patted Whiskey’s head. “Sorry I kept her from you so long pal.”

Whiskey whimpered again.

Josh placed Whiskey atop the piano as he straightened himself on the seat and prepared to play a song. The musical selection was before him unfinished, but he didn’t once glance at it. The rhythm and the words seemed to flow naturally from within.

Clear my eyes it's the morning after
Did I fall in love, or did I find disaster?
Take a second just to breathe
I pick my heart up off my sleeve, yea

It’s amazing how we fear we may be
It's from ourselves we so often run
Abandon fear and consequence of heartbreak
Expose the truth and give yourself to love

We've all been set up to be disappointed
We have to crawl before we learn to fly
It's a blur that moves right into focus…

Mya stood by the door watching his hands so effortlessly grace the keys of the piano as the words consumed her. The same melody he had played to her last night, the same melody that drew her to him in the first place while she stood out in the hall, but now the melody had words. Words that meant so much, yet held some truth to them at the same time…

The song suddenly stopped, Josh and Whiskey turned to her at the same time. Whiskey happily scurried off the piano, using Josh’s lap as a level to lead him to Mya quicker.

She bent down to stroke his soft coat when he jumped in her arms, eagerly planting wet kisses on her chin. She caught his gaze, intense yet questioning. Although she hadn’t heard the beginning of the song, the end had her brain on overload.

What would Josh say when he finally had the chance? What would she say? Was there even anything worth saying? Of course there was.

Mya had so much to say, so much to ask, but she didn’t know where to start. Earlier, Josh has started with an apology, but he had stopped. Before they had sex he had told her that they would deal with the consequences later. We will deal with it when this is all over… Two people couldn’t go through this much together without consequences.

“Mya we need to talk.”

Mya stood up with Whiskey in her arms. “I know.” She sighed. The time had finally come.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Soon as the words left his mouth, he instantly regretted it.

“Tell you what?” She asked all though she knew what he wanted the answer to. He wanted to know why she had “forgot” to mention that she was a virgin. This is the part she was dreading in the shower.

“You know…that you are-were a virgin.”

“Are you regretting it?” Cause I am. She wasn’t regretting having sex with him, she was regretting the fact it was with a man she didn’t know.

“Hell-I mean no…well a little. What I meant to say is why did you let me do it?”

“Why did I let you do what?” It’s not like she had let him take advantage of her.

“Stop it!” He suddenly yelled, confused, then lowered his voice when he saw her frown. “You should have told me…I would have never-”

“What? You said we would have to deal with the consequences.”

“Well I wasn’t expecting that to be one of them okay. I don’t do “virgins” it’s too much baggage.”

“I told you I had baggage.” Mya tried her best to laugh, but she failed.

“I’m not laughing Mya.” His face was masked with seriousness.

“Well as far as I’m concerned it was two people in that bed. You said it yourself that it was strange how life brings people together.” Why was she sitting up here explaining herself to him? Initially, she was gonna tell him that it shouldn’t have happened, but that would have been a lie. She could have pushed him away at anytime, but she didn’t, could have left at any time, but she didn’t, therefore she knew what she was setting herself up for, before they had even made it to the bed.

“You didn’t take advantage of me…” Mya paused to walk closer to him, “Okay? I could’ve stopped you at anytime, but I didn’t.” And she didn’t recall him trying to stop or pull out of her as soon as he was aware that she had been a virgin.

“I know that.”

“I don’t recall you stopping either.”

“I couldn’t have stopped if someone held a gun to my head.” This time he was the one attempting to laugh, he too failed, miserably.

“Really?”

Josh nodded, holding his arms out to her; she hesitated at first but walked into them anyway.

“I didn’t want you to stop…” Mya whispered hanging her head down shyly. She had enjoyed it too much despite the fact that she barely remembered any of it thanks to the effects of the alcohol.

“How you feeling now?”

“My head hurts, but I’m okay.” She was still a little sore as expected, but she wouldn’t dare tell him that. Besides the bath she took aided the pain somewhat.

“I’m sorry for everything bad that’s ever happened to you.” Where did that come from? Why had he felt the need to apologize to her for things he had nothing to do with? Or was he referring to the circumstances at which they met and what happened between them? Maybe the latter.

“Don’t be sorry Joshy.” She leaned down to peck his forehead, but inside she wondered if there was something she herself should be sorry for.

His eyes bored into her. “Next time will be better. I promise.”

Next time? Mya’s body surged at his words. Her nails sunk into Whiskey’s fur, drawing a protest from him. She quickly turned her attention back to the puppy. “There isn’t going to be one.”

Josh stood up abruptly, causing Mya to back away from him. “Yes…” He quickly relieved a whining Whiskey from her embrace, and sat him atop the piano then turned back to her, “…there will be.” He drew her closer to him to add truth to his statement.

When his mouth touched her skin to nuzzle her neck, Mya gasped. “Tell me I’m wrong. If you can.”

God knows she tried. She turned her head repeatedly, even tried to create some distance between them, but the piano held her captive.

Josh moved in front of her like a lion stalking his prey. “You are not a good liar Mya.” He closed the fraction of space between them.

His lips slanted over hers and it was like pure heaven all over again. She slid her eyes shut, shuddering as his hands moved down her body. His fingertips burned her skin as he raised the hem of her extra long t-shirt.

She wanted to scream out in sweet agony, but instead she moaned, her hands wrapping around his neck and into his hair.

After discovering she wore nothing underneath except for her underwear, Josh groaned lifting her in his arms and placed her atop the piano. Whiskey swiftly moved out of harm’s way of being crushed.

“Wait…” Mya suddenly pulled away as he proceeded to lift the shirt above her waist. She was breathing very heavily.

“What?” He was planting wet kisses all over her neck.

“Not here…” She gasped again. He was driving her insane. She hadn’t wanted a repeat of last night, but he was very hard to resist when he was kissing and touching her like he was right now.

“Okay…” Josh helped her down, but he sensed some resistance, Whiskey shuffled behind Mya’s back, pulling on her t-shirt with his teeth.

“You gonna fight me for her Whiskey?” Josh laughed, despite that his mood was anything, but humorous.

The puppy tightened his grip on her shirt.

“I think he won Joshy.” She turned to pat Whiskey’s head.

That nickname did awful things to him. “Yeah right.” He scooped her up and ushered her into the bedroom, closing the door to lock the puppy out.

“Aww Whiskey.”

Josh silenced her with a kiss. The welfare of his dog was the last thing on his mind right now…consequences would be dealt with later.